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Finding your purpose

I didn't have the greatest upbringing. I've experienced a lot of traumatising things in my life, I just wanted to be different from my family; like they carried on the cycle that was generational, hereditary really. I didn't want to carry on doing what my parents done.

If I had my son back in my care, my all would be in him. My everything, my attention, my time, everything would just be invested in my son. And for me, I don’t want my kid to go through what I went through because no-one deserves to go through what I went through; definitely not someone that I created. My baby deserves the world, eh?

I want to learn my language. I wanna learn te reo Maori. My brothers and sisters are fluent in it, completely; that was 'cause they went to kura kaupapa when they were taken off my mum, 'cause she was once upon a time an alcoholic.

Find your purpose in wanting to be able to give up alcohol. ‘Cause, without a purpose there's no progress; there's no anything, there's no dedication if you've got no purpose.

You have to occupy your mind instead of trying to distract your mind, 'cause if you're distracting your mind you're knowing that the alcohol’s there and you want the alcohol. But if you occupy your mind you know the alcohol’s there, but you're not interested 'cause you're occupying your thoughts on something else.

Walk, music, talk. I talk with my baby a lot. Yeah, he loves to talk. They really look up to me. And for my siblings to look up to me that’s a big thing because they don’t really look up to much people. They're private people, my siblings. They're closed. And so, for me to stay in that structure, in that routine, and make sure I don’t fall off and go and have a sneaky beer, or have a sneaky cone.

Its just anything, anything positive. It’s all about attraction, attract positive. That’s what I do every day, think attraction... the secret of attraction. What do I want to attract today?

I've got my little sisters and my little brother and my little cousins who wanna be exactly like me, but I don’t want them to be like me. I want them to be better than me. I want them to be better and greater, do greater things, experience greater things that I have not yet experienced.

Be the change you want to see in the world, eh? ‘Cause that’s what I'm doing, I want to be the change. I want to be seen as the change in my world, in my family. I want my family to see I brought the change, you know I created this. I did it for a good cause, I did it for my family, and that’s what it comes down to.